meetin' where the train tracks end
by ifandonlyif
Summary: Kemp hasn't changed... For Ana: Happy Birthday!


Hey everyone! This is for Ana, aka shell games (she's awesome, check out her writing!) because today is her birthday! Happy birthday Ana :) I did not take any prompts or anything, but hopefully it is enjoyable.

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><p><em>Back with my high school friends, meetin' where the train tracks end.<em>

"So, what do you think?" my best friend, Chris Plovert asked me, his eyes wide with excitement.

"Dude, this is awesome," I replied enthusiastically, looking around his new loft. Dear old Plovert had finally returned from medical school and started his first job next week at Manhattan Medical Center. Of course being a doctor had its perks, such as high pay which translated into one of the nicest lofts I'd seen in a while. One whole wall of the living room was floor to ceiling windows, giving a great view of the bustling street below.

A loud knocking came, jolting me from my fixation on the windows.

"It's ooooooooopen!" Plovert hollered, and in spilled Josh Hotz, Cameron Fisher, and Derrick Harrington. Their instant, simultaneous exclamations of admiration and awe were impossible to understand, but got the message across.

Josh held a case of bud light in each hand—the male version of a housewarming gift—and he crossed the entry way and set the cases on a marble counter. Cam and Derrick instantly rushed to check out the bedroom, bathroom and study before returning to the living room and adopting the same expression I'd worn just moments before.

"So you've got to tell us about medical school, man!" Josh exclaimed, bringing us each a beer as we got situated on the couches, facing the window-wall.

"Yea, any hott nurses?" Cam wiggled his eyebrows, causing us to crack up.

"Now Cammie," I started in a mocking voice, "we wouldn't want dear old Claire to have anything to be jealous about, now would we?" He blushed a little as he took an arm punch from Derrick.

"Speaking of," Josh started up, "Leesh asked me to get you guys to meet the girls at a club tonight. Something about our group being united for the first time since high school?"

Plovert and I groaned a bit, but the others couldn't, seeing as they all had girlfriends in that group.

"Fine," Plovert caved after a moment of a staredown between us and them. I shrugged and sighed. I wasn't necessarily looking forward to seeing the more memorable girls who I'd hooked up with in high school. I liked to think that I'd put my major player days behind me. Sure, I dated around and stuff, and hadn't been really serious with a girl in a while, but I never cheated or was as insensitive as I'd been in the past.

Cam and I had stuck around New York after high school; I got a good job at a construction company which is where I still worked, while Cam attended NYU and got me into some awesome parties. Derrick had joined the army and fought in Iraq for a few years, and now he had a worked in a low level position with the New York Red Bulls. Josh became a lawyer and moved back to the city about two years ago. And now Plovert was here. We were finally all back where it began.

As we chatted more about the good old high school days and caught up more with Plovert, my mind drifted to how ridiculous I'd been, chasing down the most popular girls in school…

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><p><em>I built a time machinegoing to see the homecoming queen_

Massie Block was _that girl_. The queen bee, alpha, dictator, whatever you want to call it. She was not the hottest girl in Westchester, no that title belonged to someone far more deserving. But her confidence drew absolutely everyone to her, and her charm and sassy smirk kept them there. She was shoo in for homecoming queen _and_ prom queen, and never had to show her student I.D. to get into school sponsored events. She constantly flirted with all the guys on the soccer, and by freshman spring we had a bet going: who could hook up with her first. I guess that's how it all started. Me being a player, that is.

I hate to lose. So of course I went all out for this, being charming, funny, and smart. I worked extra hard in practices and within a week I doubled my average goals scored per game. It all worked, giving me more time to chat with Massie and get her to fall for me. A lot of it was about the competition, but I really did like her at the time. I mean, who wouldn't?

By the Christmas dance, I had it all in the bag. I asked her after she had rejected a bunch of other guys, so I knew she'd been hoping I would. We danced all night an had a great time, and that night I won the bet.

The next Monday we were a couple, which seemed great. She made me laugh, and of course was beautiful, but after about two weeks, I realized that I didn't really like being in a relationship. After a month we broke up. It was mutual, and we stayed fairly good friends afterwards. Eventually, she started going out with Derrick Harrington, and I truly didn't mind. They were a better match anyway. Besides, hanging out with her and being introduced to her friends gave me my next target…

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><p><em>Maybe now I'll get in her pants. Whatever.<em>

Alicia Rivera was that exotic Spanish beauty that no one can resist. She was the pinnacle of hormonal boy fantasies; also known as the hottest girl in Westchester. By _far._ Her larger-than-average chest was probably the main factor, but in truth there was not one part of her that wasn't perfect (I can say this from experience).

During fall of sophomore year, there was a period of time when I would get up early and look out my window every Sunday morning at 8:07, when Alicia would pass by my house on her weekly morning run. She was very dependable, always on time. It may have been pervy, I know, but she was _Alicia Rivera_.

That particular Sunday, She was dressed in a simple black running tank (unfortunately not that snug) and dark pink shorts (unfortunately, not that short). Her tight ponytail swung back and forth ferociously. She turned onto my street and ran the half block to where my house was, intending on continuing her route in peace. But on this Sunday, I was impatient of only looking.

I don't know what exactly compelled me to do it, but I yelled out my window at her, "Hey Alicia, if you get tired on your way home you should stop in for some lemonade!" She looked up at my window, startled, and I just waved.

Half an hour later she was in my kitchen, and we were talking and joking like we'd been friends since birth. She was easy to talk to, and I slowly began to appreciate her for more than her amazingly hott body. That didn't mean that I saw her as any more than a conquest though.

After a couple of months of secretly hooking up, she decided she wanted to settle into a serious relationship with Josh Hotz, and so we parted ways. I spent the rest of the year hooking up with upperclassmen; some on dares and some just because they were hott and into me. No one ever found out that Alicia and I had ever been anything more than casual acquaintances.

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><p><em>Back to my parents' house. Back to the shouting out loud.<em>

Claire is the sweetest person anyone in Westchester has ever met, I'm sure. Back in Junior year, she slowly crept onto my radar. Her big blue eyes just screamed "innocent" and her friendly disposition made her super approachable. She could show up any guy at Halo, and knew more about football than the average American Male. She was the kind of girl who spent her free time at the animal shelter and gave the money she never spent on shopping trips with her friends to local charities. In a way, she was a mix of untouchable and girl-next-door, and for her it definitely worked. She instantly friend-zoned herself with every guy she met just because she was that girl you could tell anything to, so she became the little sister that none of the guys dared to hook up with.

Which of course gave me the green light.

I took it slow, which of course is what she deserved, but once it became known that we were an item, it was assumed that I'd corrupted her. I guess I had, because once the rumors spread that we were hooking up before we even were, thank you, she was all too eager to get it on.

After her parents walked in on us once (yes, that happens to still top my most embarrassing moments list), we decided to stop fooling around, and a month later she was going out with Cam Fisher. He had the total trust of her parents and they never yelled at her for dating him. Which was just as well, because as nauseating as it was to watch them interact, they were truly meant to be together.

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><p><em>One day I'll be a man. One day you'll understand.<em>

Dylan Marvil had that marvil-ous head of flaming red hair, a smile to die for, and the kind of sense of humor that made any guy swoon. Or, at least whatever the guy-equivalent to swooning is. She was the fashionable, worldly, down to earth girl who could throw any of your insults back at you or avenge practical jokes in brilliant ways. Guys were falling at her feet, but she knew many of them were only there because of her mother's notoriety, so she'd learned to be ever so picky. To me, that meant challenge #4.

We had Calculus together senior year, which was killer. No one in the class enjoyed it, not even the teacher, and because of that the camaraderie that built between the ten people in the class was super strong. My fling with Dylan was actually totally unplanned. Danny Robbins, Allie-Rose Singer, and Dylan were all at my house to study for our calculus midterm in early December. We were all moaning and groaning about having forgotten everything over Thanksgiving Break, and not really getting any studying done. We joked around and played a few videogames, ate three bags of popcorn and a 12 pack of candy canes.

Eventually Olivia had to leave, and Danny followed soon after. Dylan called her driver to come pick her up, but of course by the time he pulled into my driveway, the Mercedes had somehow broken down. Her driver waited dutifully for AAA to come with their roadside assistance, so Dylan and I hung out in my living room until the car got fixed. I wouldn't be able to recount to you how it happened exactly, but soon enough we were making out. Which definitely ended up being a good thing. We went strong until college admissions time rolled around and I didn't get in anywhere good and she accused me of not trying and being the kind of boy who would live in his high school years forever. I didn't mind—I had no major career jobs and hoped to just stay around in New York and get a job until I figured out what to do with my life. But as that wasn't good enough for Dylan, we drifted away.

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><p><em>I wanna pull it apart and put it back together. I wanna relive all my adolescent dreams.<em>

During the last month of high school I'd fallen fast and hard for a certain Ms. Gregory. It wasn't like any of my previous flings; I didn't simply want her body (although it didn't hurt in the least bit), I really liked her as a whole. She was the best female soccer player I'd ever known, and she was also one of the smartest people I'd talked to in ages. We fell into a sort of friendship, as everyone does at the end of senior year, grabbing the last chance you have with people you technically had four years to get to know. Every time I talked to her, I felt like, _how did I not discover her before?_ Every time I saw her, I did a double take. But she kept me at an arm's length, understandably because of my reputation. If I had one regret from high school, it was not ever getting a real, true shot with Kristen. I would have traded in any of my past victories for one shot at a real relationship with that girl. But me, being the somewhat screw up that I was, just shrugged it off and blamed only myself. What's done is done.

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><p><em>Here in the present tense, nothing is making sense, waiting for my moment to come, everything has come undone.<em>

I didn't know what to expect as the guys and I climbed out of the towncar Plovert had called for us. We had just wanted to take a cab, but he insisted we show up in style.

"You know how those girls are," he said insightfully, "they'll be judging us before we even show up. We might as well give them something to talk about." We all gave in, I mean, he was offering to pay for it, so why not?

We entered the crowded club and instantly spotted the girls lounging on some of the couches on the far side of the room. They were huddled in girl talk position and did not see us walk in, so we ordered them drinks and brought them over.

"Joshers!" Alicia exclaimed, being the first one to see us approach. My eyes scanned their group as Claire and Massie each greeted their respective boyfriends with a quick kiss.

"Oh, wow, Plovert! How have you been?" Dylan asked, gravitating to him instantly. Of course, she who scoffed at anyone without a college education would gravitate instantly to the one with the highest degree.

Which left me with… Kristen. As I turned my eyes on her for the first time that night, my breath nearly caught in my throat. But I knew better than to show it, simply giving her a friendly wave and navigating over to take a seat next to her on the couch.

"Hey Kemp, guess it's just you and me, huh?" she asked, gesturing at our paired-off friends. As she looked around, I gave her a closer once over. She looked better than I remembered, but still down to earth and not as glammed up as Alicia or Massie. Her blond hair looked soft and smelled of something sweet that I couldn't place. Her hazel eyes turned on me expectantly, and I realized she'd been asking me a question.

"Yea! So catch me up, how've you been?" I asked, as casual-friendly as possible.

"Oh you know, right now I've just been staying in shape and training for the World Cup," she shrugged. My eyes widened slightly, but I hid my shock. I'd heard a rumor a while ago that Kristen had gotten onto a professional women's soccer team, but hadn't thought much of it at the time. I mean, it was U.S. women's professional soccer which doesn't really hold much weight. But then there was another casual mention from Cam that she was trying out for the U.S. team for the Women's World Cup, which was far more impressive.

"Wow, congrats!" I exclaimed, hopefully not sounding phony, because I really did mean it. "That's awesome."

She gave modest shrug, before replying, "Yea, I'm excited about it. What's up with you?"

I launched into my rehearsed speech about the construction company that I was moving up in and how happy I was to have stayed close with my high school buddies. It was handy to have something to tell all my relatives when they were constantly checking in on how I was doing.

"Well, that's cool… Now tell me what's really going on," She countered, her eyes sparkling. We fell into an easy conversation about life since high school. I could hear everyone around us catching up too, but I was only interested in the girl in front of me. How did that happen so quickly?

When she briefly mentioned something about her boyfriend, I froze momentarily. Massie chose that moment to cut in, and at first I was grateful that she pulled Kristen's attention away from me, but then it was replaced with remorse.

"Yea, your insanely hott soccer-playing boyfriend," Massie inserted, earning a glare from Derrick and a blush from Kristen. "What? It's so true."

I don't know what I had expected. I mean this was not like unthinkable, that someone as awesome as Kristen would have a boyfriend, not to mention one that was a professional soccer player—someone I could never measure up to. _Why would I need to measure up?_ I thought, catching myself. I mean, it's not like after half an hour of seeing her for the first time in eight years I was hoping to be her boyfriend… Ok. Fine. Maybe I was. Just don't tell anyone.

I was a bit more reserved after that, but did a good job of not letting it show. We ordered a few more drinks and talked as a group for a while, until Massie got restless and pulled Claire onto the dance floor. It was crowded out there, but soon Alicia pulled Josh out, and Plovert asked Dylan if she'd like to dance, and Cam and Derrick went to chase down their girlfriends. Which left Kristen and me alone on the couch again.

After a few beats of watching our friends go crazy, she turned to me.

"Wanna dance?"

"Wouldn't your boyfriend be upset?" I countered, and then nearly slapped myself for not just accepting.

"Eh, probably not. He's in L.A. for a game this weekend, and besides, we're just friends. He's good about that," she smiled softly, a faraway look in her eyes. Friends. We were friends again. I could handle that. I wasn't _that_ attracted to her, I only felt like this because I hadn't seen her in forever. This would be fine. We'd be friends.

She stood and let out a giggle at my contemplative face. "C'mon. Get up here, you fool," she exclaimed, pulling me up off the couch and toward the packed dance floor. I downed a shot on the way and then lost myself to the music and the way Kristen was moving… I felt like pulling her closer, but I knew that would not be a wise move… or would it? Hmmmmmm.

The music got louder and my head started pounding a little as the bass was cranked. The space seemed to get smaller as more people rushed the dance floor, accidentally pushing Kristen up against me. At least that worked out nicely. We danced closely for a while longer, and my desire for her grew exponentially. But I knew any actions on that desire would ruin any trust she might have in me now.

I glanced to my right and saw Alicia grinding heavily on Josh, and shook my head. He had it easy. I looked down to see Kristin gazing up at me intently. She looked like she wanted to tell me something, but all of a sudden I couldn't stand it. Since when did I care this much about a girl; I should take advantage of the situation now, right? I leaned down lightning quick and captured her lips with mine.

The first thought that ran through my head was: YES! The second was: CRAP! For about half a second she kissed back from shock, before the inevitable slap, and "You bastard, I have a boyfriend," and the stomping away and the guys coming over and pulling me away from the situation and complaining how their girlfriends had all left them to go attend to Kristen.

I sunk into one of the couches while Cam went to get me a water, and felt dizzy. This was just like me, to ruin something like this. The girls knew it, and the guys pretended not to know it, and I tried to tell myself I'd changed, but I was always just too impulsive. I ruined every good thing that came my way. I texted an apology to Kristen, after swiping her number from Derrick. I had no hope for any sort of forgiveness though. I wasn't the forgivable kind of person; I had too many mistakes under my belt.

In that moment, I looked around at the guys who were staring at me, concerned. They were a little blurry and I was still dizzy, but one thing was clear. All these unhappy endings of mine were completely my fault, no one else's. It was up to me to fix things like this, or not let myself into these situations anyway.

With that determined, I decided to start reforming my life tomorrow. However now was a good time to drink away my pain.

_I tried to pull it apart and put it back together. No point in living in my adolescent dreams. Inspired by true events on movie screens, I am a one man wrecking machine._

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><p>Ok. So. That didn't really turn out how I expected it to. I mean, I didn't really know what to expect. The song is Guster's One Man Wrecking Machine, and I always thought it fit Kemp well. But the ending is all... not-happy which is sort of not how I picture a birthday present being. But yea. I hope this wasn't too suckish. And I hope everyone is having a good summer!<p>

Hugs,  
>Sky<p> 


End file.
